i'm going to be trying to figure out who i am for the rest of my life. isn't that the mystery to life? that we never really know... or when we think we do, we've suddenly changed or grown again and have a new realm to figure out? i have a feeling that the only time i will be totally confident in saying that i know exactly who i am is when i'm on my deathbed. or 92 or something, and only a few years left. then i can say i've gathered all the pertinent informations. spent enough time with the test subject. made my deductions. learned.

i'm the luckiest girl in the world....

i'm really into Beck's last album lately (Sea Change)... Nigel Goderich would be my ultimate producer choice if i won the lottery. but it's interesting because although i'm really enjoying the record, for the first time in my life i think i'm not heartbroken enough to really feel it the way it could be felt. boy, does this mean i'm losing my edge?

nah...


different sort of edge... i hope!

really excited because i'm now producing another artist... we just finished a song for her music video and starting next week will be working on a full record... it's very cool working on someone else's music... you have a different sort of objectivity. i now realize i've been really obsessing over some production aspects of my own record, things that i probably don't have any control over come mixing time... so why am i stressing??? i should lay back and let mastering take care of it.

so an update on my own record: drums have been recut, i recorded everything on a georgeous grand piano (thanks michael) and may do some additional vocals this weekend... but otherwise, ready to mix!

marc and i are playing in hamilton next week. it will be fun to get out of town (it's been too long since i toured and i'm really starting to miss it). once the album is done, i will definitely be into the idea of touring more again. look out!!!!

k

i'm getting better at not checking my email in the morning. it used to be that it would be my first thing out of bed... now i'm purposely avoiding the computer. i am reading, writing, doing what feel to be soul-nurturing things. especially on a day like today, when i'm going to record music. i am starting piano tracks today, on a beautiful grand piano, thanks to M. i don't know where i'd be on this record without the generosity of so many friends. certainly nowhere near where i am now.

i get nervous but i don't know it. i avoid actually starting... without realizing it. then i see what i'm doing... what am i afraid of? not getting the mucho mundo perfect take? there are always more takes. the main thing to remember: there are much bigger things going on in the world than what i'm doing here. more serious things to worry about if i'm going to worry already. be grateful for what i am able to do with my day today.

currently reading: Cat's Eye by Margaret Atwood
highly recommend: Oryx and Crake (also Atwood)

i want to build my own tremolo pedal.

k